cosmo tips: spice things up in the bedroom by shoving a jalapeño up your partner’s ass
i was cuddling this guy once n he had his head on my chest n just whispered “what did you just think about?” and i went “netflix” becus i was thinkin about netflix and he just went
"oh. your heart sped up and i… ok"
at my funeral when they’re lowering me into the ground i demand they play drop it like its hot